Inspirational envy

I am having serious greenies. Procastinating, skipping through blogs, wanting to be wowed, and the I am, and start reading through well articulated, funny, beautiful words and pictures and cool clothes and seemingly put together people that COPE and eat couscous for a month having spent their money on really cool clothes and does collages and FINISH projects.

It is very rare that I finish anything. My creativity sort of dries up when the "fun" part is over: the plans, the vision..But I am getting better. I am writing here. I am finishing knitting projects. I am studying. (more than ever, still not enough, but getting better) But the end resault just do not measure up to the idea. Or maybe that is what I am afraid of? Probably. The curse of the perfectionist.

And clothing. I would love to be elegant. Elegant and edgy, and look good in flat shoes. Or give a damn that I do not? And all these fashion blogs feature skinny girls/women with straight legs that looks really good in highwaisted shorts and tight trousers and I curse my pearshaped hippy body and have moments of considering cous-cous diet just to be able to by trousers. But I will not. Because I am not willing to use time.

Elegance is making something hard look easy and even though some "just throw on the first thing they find" and look fab, they do not really. Those "first things" are well cut clothing, effort was made in finding them and bying them, the hair is pampered and cut well, eating healthy or in some cases just little....Effort has been made, only maybe not at 0700 in the morning.

In my instant gratification world I'd rather by a good book.

This is still a bit maudlin. Prob because the real issue is exams closing up and me still being a major chicken-cat in regards to university professors and such.

Ballet this evening will sort me out. And tomorrow it is 17. Mai, and I have decided to go and eat a menu at Baobab, a great vegetarian resturant here in Zaragoza.